Butterflies

It's graduation time and oddly enough, this is the time I'm "graduating" from therapy. Next week will be my last session, a wrap up session.

Honestly, it's a little scary to go out on my own. D's been a sounding board, a neutral party, for a really long time - 11 months to be precise. I feel ready. I have done a lot of work and I continue to monitor what's going on in my head - what I'm thinking and how I'm feeling about things and why I'm feeling them. I am making better decisions and the anxiety that filled me for so many years has all but disappeared.

D reminded me of the beginning of the book where it talks about caterpillars vs. butterflies.

"Nature provides many examples of this incredible discrepancy between who we appear to be and who we truly are. Consider the caterpillar. If we brought a caterpillar to a biologist and asked him to analyze it and describe its DNA, he would tell us, "I know this looks like a caterpillar to you, but scientifically, according to every test, including DNA, this is fully and completely a butterfly." God has wired into a creature what looks nothing like a butterfly, a perfectly complete butterfly "identity". And because the caterpillar is a butterfly in essence, it will one day display the behavior and attributes of a butterfly. The caterpillar matures into what is already true about it. In the meantime, berating the caterpillar for not being more like a butterfly is not only futile, it will probably hurt his tiny ears!

So it is with us. God has given us the DNA of godliness. We are saints. Righteous. Nothing we do will make us more rigtheous than we already are. Nothing we do will alter this reality. God knows our DNA. He knows that we are "Christ in me." And now he is asking us to join him in what he knows is true!"

I love that analogy and I'm so glad that D reminded me of it.

As my "official" therapy ends, I know my "life" therapy never will. I'll probably be heading back over to see another "D" sometime for various life changes that need some extra help... but for now, I'm going shed the rest of my chrysalis and jump. With God's help, I'll be doing a lot of flying - keep your eyes out!