So here's the main part of the book. Each chapter is divided by a month starting with January. The goal is to perfect each "task" and by December be able to do them all perfectly. I've really been thinking about all this this past month and I really don't want this to be work. It's summer! I want it to be fun.
I'm posting the complete list for you to check out. I'm going to look through it and pick a couple of things I'm really interested in doing. Maybe it will take me a year... who knows.
I also would like to try and see if I can get the kids to create their own "mini" happiness project. That may be overzealous.
Month 1 - Boost Energy
- Go to sleep earlier
- Exercise better
- Tackle a nagging task
- Act more energetic
Month 2 - Remember Love
- Quit nagging
- Don't expect praise or appreciation
- Fight right
- No dumping
- Give proofs of love
Month 3 - Aim Higher
- Enjoy the fun of failure
- Ask for help
- Work smart
- Enjoy now
Month 4 - Lighten Up
- Sing in the morning
- Acknowledge the reality of people's feelings
- Be a treasure house of happy memories
- Take time for projects
Month 5 - Be Serious About Play
- Find more fun
- Take time to be silly
- Go off the path
- Start a collection
Month 6 - Buy Some Happiness
- Indulge in a modest splurge
- Buy needful things
- Spend out
- Give something up
Month 7 - Contemplate the Heavens
- Read memoirs of a catastrophe
- Keep a gratitude notebook
- Imitate a spiritual master
Month 8 - Pursue a Passion
- Create a portfolio
- Make time
- Forget about the results
- Master a new technology
Month 9 - Pay Attention
- Pray purposefully
- Stimulate the mind in new ways
- Keep a food diary
Month 10 - Make time for friends
- Remember birthdays
- Be generous
- Show up
- Don't gossip
- Make three new friends
Month 11 - Keep a Contented Heart
- Laugh out loud
- Use good manners
- Give positive reviews
- Find an area of refuge
Month 12 - Boot Camp Perfect!
I'd love your thoughts and comments!
Friday, May 28, 2010
Peace
You know that feeling? The feeling of peace. Like the world is just the way it's supposed to be? Well... maybe just my world.
Today I feel that way. Like life is just the way it's supposed to be, in an altered, not perfect way.
Not all my questions have answers, not all my fears subsided, not all my hurt gone, not all my anxiety calmed... but things are still good.
Peace. Love. Hope. Strength.
Today I feel like I am floating in God's love and support. It's a nice feeling.
Today I feel that way. Like life is just the way it's supposed to be, in an altered, not perfect way.
Not all my questions have answers, not all my fears subsided, not all my hurt gone, not all my anxiety calmed... but things are still good.
Peace. Love. Hope. Strength.
Today I feel like I am floating in God's love and support. It's a nice feeling.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Closure
I had been thinking of this for a few weeks now... apologizing to him. I did it.
I wasn't angry. I didn't feel obligated to. I wasn't nervous about it. It just felt right. I apologized for my part in it without getting into the weeds of it all.
I don't want to live years and years thinking about it. I don't want to think back 5 years from now "I really wanted to say this and I didn't." 5 years from now it wouldn't mean anything. 5 years from now I may not care anymore and he may not either. If I didn't do it now, 5 years from now our relationship may be different because I didn't. Or... maybe it would be the same. Who knows?
What I do know for sure is that I'm glad I apologized for my part. I'm glad he knows I acknowledge that it wasn't all him, because it wasn't. It takes two to say "I do" and it takes two to say "I don't".
Closure.
I wasn't angry. I didn't feel obligated to. I wasn't nervous about it. It just felt right. I apologized for my part in it without getting into the weeds of it all.
I don't want to live years and years thinking about it. I don't want to think back 5 years from now "I really wanted to say this and I didn't." 5 years from now it wouldn't mean anything. 5 years from now I may not care anymore and he may not either. If I didn't do it now, 5 years from now our relationship may be different because I didn't. Or... maybe it would be the same. Who knows?
What I do know for sure is that I'm glad I apologized for my part. I'm glad he knows I acknowledge that it wasn't all him, because it wasn't. It takes two to say "I do" and it takes two to say "I don't".
Closure.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
The meeting
So it's not a secret anymore... to anyone. I have a boyfriend. And the boys know it.
It went really well actually. I don't know what I was expecting. Of course I tend to invite various scenarios in my head, trying to work through the "what ifs". What if they hate him? What if they kick him? What if they say super embarrassing things about me? What if, what if, what if... So in the end... "What if they like him and it goes really well?" was the winner.
Reece struggled a bit after the day was over and after a couple of conversations I realized that he's sad for his dad because his dad doesn't have a girlfriend (biting my tongue right now). He really likes B and I think he's feeling a bit like he's betraying his dad. That makes sense to me. Oh my word! If my parents divorced and my mom got a boyfriend I would constantly be comparing him to my dad because... well... my dad rocks. And that's how Mr. Reece is feeling too.
And there you have it. I have a boyfriend who likes my kids (or hides the fact that he doesn't really well... whatever, it works for me) and kids who really like him.
I thought I would be nervous to do my "mom" thing around someone who has never seen me as a mom but it went really well. Think about it. Normally when you meet someone, your kids are with you, you have some kind of kid fluid on you (spit up, snot, juice, whatever!), or your purse if filled with kid paraphernalia. But when I go on a date with B, I make sure I'm clear of all kid "markings" - yep, I make sure I look all grown up and as tempting as it might be... I don't cut his food for him. But when my kids are around, there's no getting my dating game on, it's all hands on deck and I'm 100% "mom". I'll wipe boogers, kiss ouchies, love on them and scold them and not really worry about what's going on around me because the boys are my focus.
In the end we all survived the meeting and I pray that the boys continue to grow through this process and truly understand that wherever this journey takes us that their well-being is my priority and I will do whatever it takes to make this journey a great one for all of us.
It went really well actually. I don't know what I was expecting. Of course I tend to invite various scenarios in my head, trying to work through the "what ifs". What if they hate him? What if they kick him? What if they say super embarrassing things about me? What if, what if, what if... So in the end... "What if they like him and it goes really well?" was the winner.
Reece struggled a bit after the day was over and after a couple of conversations I realized that he's sad for his dad because his dad doesn't have a girlfriend (biting my tongue right now). He really likes B and I think he's feeling a bit like he's betraying his dad. That makes sense to me. Oh my word! If my parents divorced and my mom got a boyfriend I would constantly be comparing him to my dad because... well... my dad rocks. And that's how Mr. Reece is feeling too.
And there you have it. I have a boyfriend who likes my kids (or hides the fact that he doesn't really well... whatever, it works for me) and kids who really like him.
I thought I would be nervous to do my "mom" thing around someone who has never seen me as a mom but it went really well. Think about it. Normally when you meet someone, your kids are with you, you have some kind of kid fluid on you (spit up, snot, juice, whatever!), or your purse if filled with kid paraphernalia. But when I go on a date with B, I make sure I'm clear of all kid "markings" - yep, I make sure I look all grown up and as tempting as it might be... I don't cut his food for him. But when my kids are around, there's no getting my dating game on, it's all hands on deck and I'm 100% "mom". I'll wipe boogers, kiss ouchies, love on them and scold them and not really worry about what's going on around me because the boys are my focus.
In the end we all survived the meeting and I pray that the boys continue to grow through this process and truly understand that wherever this journey takes us that their well-being is my priority and I will do whatever it takes to make this journey a great one for all of us.
Monday, May 24, 2010
Butterflies
It's graduation time and oddly enough, this is the time I'm "graduating" from therapy. Next week will be my last session, a wrap up session.
Honestly, it's a little scary to go out on my own. D's been a sounding board, a neutral party, for a really long time - 11 months to be precise. I feel ready. I have done a lot of work and I continue to monitor what's going on in my head - what I'm thinking and how I'm feeling about things and why I'm feeling them. I am making better decisions and the anxiety that filled me for so many years has all but disappeared.
D reminded me of the beginning of the book where it talks about caterpillars vs. butterflies.
"Nature provides many examples of this incredible discrepancy between who we appear to be and who we truly are. Consider the caterpillar. If we brought a caterpillar to a biologist and asked him to analyze it and describe its DNA, he would tell us, "I know this looks like a caterpillar to you, but scientifically, according to every test, including DNA, this is fully and completely a butterfly." God has wired into a creature what looks nothing like a butterfly, a perfectly complete butterfly "identity". And because the caterpillar is a butterfly in essence, it will one day display the behavior and attributes of a butterfly. The caterpillar matures into what is already true about it. In the meantime, berating the caterpillar for not being more like a butterfly is not only futile, it will probably hurt his tiny ears!
So it is with us. God has given us the DNA of godliness. We are saints. Righteous. Nothing we do will make us more rigtheous than we already are. Nothing we do will alter this reality. God knows our DNA. He knows that we are "Christ in me." And now he is asking us to join him in what he knows is true!"
I love that analogy and I'm so glad that D reminded me of it.
As my "official" therapy ends, I know my "life" therapy never will. I'll probably be heading back over to see another "D" sometime for various life changes that need some extra help... but for now, I'm going shed the rest of my chrysalis and jump. With God's help, I'll be doing a lot of flying - keep your eyes out!
Honestly, it's a little scary to go out on my own. D's been a sounding board, a neutral party, for a really long time - 11 months to be precise. I feel ready. I have done a lot of work and I continue to monitor what's going on in my head - what I'm thinking and how I'm feeling about things and why I'm feeling them. I am making better decisions and the anxiety that filled me for so many years has all but disappeared.
D reminded me of the beginning of the book where it talks about caterpillars vs. butterflies.
"Nature provides many examples of this incredible discrepancy between who we appear to be and who we truly are. Consider the caterpillar. If we brought a caterpillar to a biologist and asked him to analyze it and describe its DNA, he would tell us, "I know this looks like a caterpillar to you, but scientifically, according to every test, including DNA, this is fully and completely a butterfly." God has wired into a creature what looks nothing like a butterfly, a perfectly complete butterfly "identity". And because the caterpillar is a butterfly in essence, it will one day display the behavior and attributes of a butterfly. The caterpillar matures into what is already true about it. In the meantime, berating the caterpillar for not being more like a butterfly is not only futile, it will probably hurt his tiny ears!
So it is with us. God has given us the DNA of godliness. We are saints. Righteous. Nothing we do will make us more rigtheous than we already are. Nothing we do will alter this reality. God knows our DNA. He knows that we are "Christ in me." And now he is asking us to join him in what he knows is true!"
I love that analogy and I'm so glad that D reminded me of it.
As my "official" therapy ends, I know my "life" therapy never will. I'll probably be heading back over to see another "D" sometime for various life changes that need some extra help... but for now, I'm going shed the rest of my chrysalis and jump. With God's help, I'll be doing a lot of flying - keep your eyes out!
Thursday, May 20, 2010
The final chapter
I just finished reading "TrueFaced" tonight. D and I have been reading through this for about 2 1/2 months now (1 chapter per week... sometimes 1 chapter for 2 weeks). It's a must read - probably the best "self help book" I've ever read... and I've read my fair share!
Below are a few of my favorite highlights from the final chapter. Enjoy!
Ever since we were children we have had dreams and hopes of destiny. Some of these dreams are our own, but others came from the very hand of God - and God's dreams never go off the radar screen. Even time, failure, or heartbreak can't make us forget them entirely. Still, most of us have tried to stuff them into the attic. We have been rudely awakened out of too many of them, too many times, and each time we lost more and more of the dream. Yet even if we've forgotten the fiber of those dreams, God has not.
What dream is God dreaming when He dreams about you and about me, and how can we help that dream come true?
We are all performers, but because of sin we've lost confidence that we will always please our audience, and so we put on a mask. As an unintended result, no one, not even the people I love, ever get to see my true face. The real me.
We are all performers. One question remains: Will you perform to gain the acceptance and pleasure of your audience - and always feel that you have failed? Or will you perform out of a heart of trusting delight, knowing you have already please your Audience?
A word of caution... I'm no longer performing for you, actually I haven't been for about 6 months. This is me. True faced. Enjoy.
Below are a few of my favorite highlights from the final chapter. Enjoy!
Ever since we were children we have had dreams and hopes of destiny. Some of these dreams are our own, but others came from the very hand of God - and God's dreams never go off the radar screen. Even time, failure, or heartbreak can't make us forget them entirely. Still, most of us have tried to stuff them into the attic. We have been rudely awakened out of too many of them, too many times, and each time we lost more and more of the dream. Yet even if we've forgotten the fiber of those dreams, God has not.
What dream is God dreaming when He dreams about you and about me, and how can we help that dream come true?
We are all performers, but because of sin we've lost confidence that we will always please our audience, and so we put on a mask. As an unintended result, no one, not even the people I love, ever get to see my true face. The real me.
We are all performers. One question remains: Will you perform to gain the acceptance and pleasure of your audience - and always feel that you have failed? Or will you perform out of a heart of trusting delight, knowing you have already please your Audience?
A word of caution... I'm no longer performing for you, actually I haven't been for about 6 months. This is me. True faced. Enjoy.
Monday, May 17, 2010
Steppin' out
I did it. I stepped out into the unknown, let my guard down and had a really great time! Rockfest 2010 was muddy, rainy, cold and just what I needed.
Taking leaps and doing things that are uncomfortable is probably one of the best ways for me to learn more about who I am and what I'm really all about. I've been very honest about Rockfest - I'm not a huge fan of the music... honestly I can't understand the lyrics unless C sings them to me (and she did a great job doing that). But it wasn't about the music. It was about doing something that for a long time I told myself I "shouldn't" do in order to be a certain kind of person. It was about breaking down the rules that controlled my life. I didn't care if my friends went but me? I wouldn't do it because I felt a judgement... probably my own. I shouldn't leave my kids for a rock concert. I shouldn't occasionaly drink. I shouldn't see the things I saw at the concert.
I created rules. Rules that I thought would keep me safe from hurt or sin, something I desperatly tried to avoid. The only thing those rules created were more barriers that made me feel suffocated. Imagine fencing your backyard to keep your kids safe. You look around the yard and you see the gas meter on the side, so you put a fence around that... Oh! And the tree - you don't want them to climb the tree because they could get hurt, so there's another fence. And then what about the deck? It has stairs - you put a fence around that too - they could trip! Pretty soon you look around the yard and your kids are now limited to tiny little "safe" area. An area that is very safe, but it doesn't teach them a thing about who they are, what they like to do or teach them to keep themselves safe. They really will be safe in that tiny little area, but they will never be able to live and experience a childhood. They will never experience life.
My rules, my fear of judgement was preventing me from living.
I sat in church every Sunday and listened to the sermons and instead of hearing grace I focused on what I needed to do so that God would love me and never really understood that He loves me no matter what. He loves me in a pure unimaginable way. Sure, I disappoint Him, I make Him cringe and He shakes His head wondering when I'll smarten up... but He loves me regardless of my flaws. I don't have to "should" my way into His arms... I'm already there!
I am standing on my grounded identity. I will fail, I won't always say the right thing and I will do things that may not be what some think I should do, but I've learned that I can't should my life away and I won't should others' lives away either.
I'm a woman, a mom, a sister, a daughter, a girlfriend, an ex-wife, a grand-daughter, a friend, a co-worker but best of all I'm His.
Taking leaps and doing things that are uncomfortable is probably one of the best ways for me to learn more about who I am and what I'm really all about. I've been very honest about Rockfest - I'm not a huge fan of the music... honestly I can't understand the lyrics unless C sings them to me (and she did a great job doing that). But it wasn't about the music. It was about doing something that for a long time I told myself I "shouldn't" do in order to be a certain kind of person. It was about breaking down the rules that controlled my life. I didn't care if my friends went but me? I wouldn't do it because I felt a judgement... probably my own. I shouldn't leave my kids for a rock concert. I shouldn't occasionaly drink. I shouldn't see the things I saw at the concert.
I created rules. Rules that I thought would keep me safe from hurt or sin, something I desperatly tried to avoid. The only thing those rules created were more barriers that made me feel suffocated. Imagine fencing your backyard to keep your kids safe. You look around the yard and you see the gas meter on the side, so you put a fence around that... Oh! And the tree - you don't want them to climb the tree because they could get hurt, so there's another fence. And then what about the deck? It has stairs - you put a fence around that too - they could trip! Pretty soon you look around the yard and your kids are now limited to tiny little "safe" area. An area that is very safe, but it doesn't teach them a thing about who they are, what they like to do or teach them to keep themselves safe. They really will be safe in that tiny little area, but they will never be able to live and experience a childhood. They will never experience life.
My rules, my fear of judgement was preventing me from living.
I sat in church every Sunday and listened to the sermons and instead of hearing grace I focused on what I needed to do so that God would love me and never really understood that He loves me no matter what. He loves me in a pure unimaginable way. Sure, I disappoint Him, I make Him cringe and He shakes His head wondering when I'll smarten up... but He loves me regardless of my flaws. I don't have to "should" my way into His arms... I'm already there!
I am standing on my grounded identity. I will fail, I won't always say the right thing and I will do things that may not be what some think I should do, but I've learned that I can't should my life away and I won't should others' lives away either.
I'm a woman, a mom, a sister, a daughter, a girlfriend, an ex-wife, a grand-daughter, a friend, a co-worker but best of all I'm His.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
No regrets
I feel a mixture of emotions. Great, indifferent, sad...
I'm glad I said what I said after the hearing. I do not regret marrying him. These last 11 years were a blessing and I would not be who I am today without the experiences I've had. Good times, bad times - they made me who I am today... how can I regret that?
I met with D this morning and we discussed my feelings (cause... in case you ever wonder... that's what you talk about in therapy... a lot.). I'm in such a different place right now. We talk about the "new" Renee and the "old" Renee. The "old" me made decisions on the look good/feel good and those decisions were always rushed. The decisions were made quickly in order to avoid really looking into the actual motive. Now I'm making decisions based on the right and good. Those decisions are made carefully and with a lot of prayer and thought. They aren't based on what feels right but what is right for me.
I share with D that there are so many people I want to apologize to for giving them advice based on the "shoulds" of life. "You should do this because..." is a phrase I would often say. I've learned that shoulds are ridiculous and drain you. There are no shoulds in life... there are only choices. Shoulds take away choices and when the choices are gone we are stuck.
It feels good to be in this place. A new life. A new start. A new day.
I'm glad I said what I said after the hearing. I do not regret marrying him. These last 11 years were a blessing and I would not be who I am today without the experiences I've had. Good times, bad times - they made me who I am today... how can I regret that?
I met with D this morning and we discussed my feelings (cause... in case you ever wonder... that's what you talk about in therapy... a lot.). I'm in such a different place right now. We talk about the "new" Renee and the "old" Renee. The "old" me made decisions on the look good/feel good and those decisions were always rushed. The decisions were made quickly in order to avoid really looking into the actual motive. Now I'm making decisions based on the right and good. Those decisions are made carefully and with a lot of prayer and thought. They aren't based on what feels right but what is right for me.
I share with D that there are so many people I want to apologize to for giving them advice based on the "shoulds" of life. "You should do this because..." is a phrase I would often say. I've learned that shoulds are ridiculous and drain you. There are no shoulds in life... there are only choices. Shoulds take away choices and when the choices are gone we are stuck.
It feels good to be in this place. A new life. A new start. A new day.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
The calm after the storm
It's the pattern of destruction, isn't it? After every crazy wild storm, there's a calm. A peace. A moment when things seem to have settled into a new normal. The damage is still done, the pieces laying everywhere but it still seems that even with the pieces broken and laying everywhere, they have settled into a comfortable place.
That's where it all is now. Broken but having found a new comfort.
That's where it all is now. Broken but having found a new comfort.
Monday, May 10, 2010
The gloves are off
It's a choice. Doors locked, shades drawn, watching my back, filing police reports. Life in this moment. Chaos. Maybe it’s overkill, but maybe it’s not.
D asked me this morning what I was feeling. Numb. She didn’t like that response. I am in survival mode, I have to be.
Breaking into my email and Facebook account was the straw that broke the camels back. The gloves are off and as numb as I am, I’m not paralyzed by fear as I have been. I know what I need to do… it may not be at the pace everyone else would like, but I’m doing it. I feel violated but mostly, I feel disgusted by the behavior.
It is so wrong that at this point in my relationship with B, we have to side step and deal with someone else’s emotional garbage.
This entire thing is just a mess and I want to pray it away, but through this, I know God is in control. He has a plan for this fiasco and when I look back 6 or 9 months from now, it will all make sense and I will praise Him for the lessons this taught me. I will praise Him for the growth it produced in me.
D asked me this morning what I was feeling. Numb. She didn’t like that response. I am in survival mode, I have to be.
Breaking into my email and Facebook account was the straw that broke the camels back. The gloves are off and as numb as I am, I’m not paralyzed by fear as I have been. I know what I need to do… it may not be at the pace everyone else would like, but I’m doing it. I feel violated but mostly, I feel disgusted by the behavior.
It is so wrong that at this point in my relationship with B, we have to side step and deal with someone else’s emotional garbage.
This entire thing is just a mess and I want to pray it away, but through this, I know God is in control. He has a plan for this fiasco and when I look back 6 or 9 months from now, it will all make sense and I will praise Him for the lessons this taught me. I will praise Him for the growth it produced in me.
Shifting Gears
I took my blog offline this morning. He found it and used the information on it for his benefit. The rage was unreal. Find out now or later about B, doesn’t really matter – the reaction would have been the same.
The divorce papers were signed today and the divorce will be final next Tuesday. I’m looking forward to officially closing that chapter of my life and start to truly move forward.
There's been quite a bit of drama these past few days... none of it great. That's how life goes, I suppose. Ups and downs and twists and turns. I sure wish I could hit a nice long stretch of Kansas Plains soon.
The divorce papers were signed today and the divorce will be final next Tuesday. I’m looking forward to officially closing that chapter of my life and start to truly move forward.
There's been quite a bit of drama these past few days... none of it great. That's how life goes, I suppose. Ups and downs and twists and turns. I sure wish I could hit a nice long stretch of Kansas Plains soon.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Running
When I laid down at 3am, after taking the last of my anxiety medicine (I hadn't touched the stuff in months), I felt the same feeling creeping up inside me. All the lights were on in the apartment, I laid on my left side so that I could see the door, my purse was on the floor next to the bed, I was fully clothed, glasses on, cell phone in hand. I was terrified that he would make good on his threats.
I laid there thinking about where I was and how I'd gotten here. Running and re-running the conversations of the past 2 hours in my head. I had followed every one's advice. Said what I was supposed to say, I was strong and direct, and here I was again, terrified and alone. That's my problem. If I do what is right and good, I should get right and good results, shouldn't I? I hate those stupid rose colored glasses.
As I was trying to make sure the kids were safe, a friend who was going to check on them said to me "Drive, drive as far as you can, where he doesn't know where you are. I'll call you when it's safe."
My life. This is not the life I want. As hard as I fought for my marriage and as hard as I fought for a peaceful divorce, I realize again that I haven't completely given this one over to God. It is now officially His, cause I can't do it right. I can't keep giving in to all his requests in hopes that it will keep him calm and in turn make it less stressful for all.
B, S and T are the only three I want to see or talk to. I'm fighting to get out of that because I know it's my pattern. It's me trying to protect myself from more hurt and more judgement from my other friends. I've always felt the support and love from my friends, but in my head, by distancing myself from everyone makes me think I'm protecting them. It's not right and I'm fighting to get out of it and this time it won't last months like it did the previous time. I just need a little grace.
I'm going to go to church this morning and worship. I'm going to pray that God covers him with peace and comforts him with love. I don't ask God this request for me, I'm asking for the boys.
Will you pray for them too?
I laid there thinking about where I was and how I'd gotten here. Running and re-running the conversations of the past 2 hours in my head. I had followed every one's advice. Said what I was supposed to say, I was strong and direct, and here I was again, terrified and alone. That's my problem. If I do what is right and good, I should get right and good results, shouldn't I? I hate those stupid rose colored glasses.
As I was trying to make sure the kids were safe, a friend who was going to check on them said to me "Drive, drive as far as you can, where he doesn't know where you are. I'll call you when it's safe."
My life. This is not the life I want. As hard as I fought for my marriage and as hard as I fought for a peaceful divorce, I realize again that I haven't completely given this one over to God. It is now officially His, cause I can't do it right. I can't keep giving in to all his requests in hopes that it will keep him calm and in turn make it less stressful for all.
B, S and T are the only three I want to see or talk to. I'm fighting to get out of that because I know it's my pattern. It's me trying to protect myself from more hurt and more judgement from my other friends. I've always felt the support and love from my friends, but in my head, by distancing myself from everyone makes me think I'm protecting them. It's not right and I'm fighting to get out of it and this time it won't last months like it did the previous time. I just need a little grace.
I'm going to go to church this morning and worship. I'm going to pray that God covers him with peace and comforts him with love. I don't ask God this request for me, I'm asking for the boys.
Will you pray for them too?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)