Just say it like it is

As I dropped my little monkey off at preschool this morning, a few of his friends approached me and wanted to chat. M wanted to talk first and told me his name, his full name. I shook his hand and told him I was "R's" mom and that it was nice to meet him. Next came B who wanted in on this conversation. I shook his hand as well and told him that we were just talking about him in the car - that his name starts with a "B!". He smiled and told me his daddy was picking him up today. M piped in and told me his mom was because his daddy didn't live with him. He went on to tell me his daddy hurt him so he's far far away and he doesn't know where B and his mom live. I told him it was very awesome that his mom loved him so much that she wanted to keep him safe and that I was sorry his daddy did those mean things to him. He would have gone on and on and I could have listened longer but it wasn't the most appropriate place to have such conversations, with other children surrounding us and his teachers seemed pretty uncomfortable.

My heart breaks for B. I'm thankful that his mom was able to leave a very bad situation and find a safe place for them to live.

The thing that struck me as B chatted with was his openness and the way he shared so freely his life's struggles.

That is my absolute favorite thing about children. They just say it like it is. There's no mask to hide behind, there's no pretending to be a certain way or that their lives are perfect and amazing.  They just talk to you and tell you their lives trusting you, believing that what's happening in their lives is just as normal as what is happening in yours.

The truth is, it is.

My life is just like B's life. It's imperfect and crazy. It's scary and fun. It's lovely and wicked. It's life.

When did we start pretending ourselves and our lives to be better than others? When did we learn to judge and ridicule that which we don't understand? When is it that hiding our hearts, our struggles was better than being real and authentic? Why does being real and authentic make others uncomfortable?

I might not say what I'm supposed to say. I might not tell  you what you want to hear. I might offend and hurt you. I might make you extremely happy. I might break your heart. I might do all kinds of crazy, unexplainable things but one thing I promise to always strive to do - be real.