So we took the class. We did the homework. We welcome the children. 11 as of today.
Our hearts get bigger, fuller. I suppose, because they grow in size, when the stories roll in or they leave our home, our hearts break harder, the ache lasts longer. We worry about their future.
"I could never do that." people tell us.
Love them, then give them back.
They were never ours to begin with.
We signed up to love kids as our own. And we do.
We signed up to love their parents to reunify. And we do.
And it's hard.
And it's painful.
And we do it again and again.
Thursday, November 9, 2017
Monday, October 30, 2017
19 Years and Counting...
A couple of weeks ago we celebrated you.
19 years old and such a wonderful young lady.
I wonder how much longer you'll ask for our opinion.
I wonder what you think of us now that you've had "freedom".
I wonder if you know how much you mean to me.
I wonder if you know how much I miss you, your presence, your laugh, your thoughts.
I wonder if you know much much I don't miss losing Skip-Bo to you (ha!).
I wonder if you know what joy watching you and your brothers together gives me.
You sweet A, are my all time favorite daughter.
You are strong and courageous and bold and loyal and adventurous and beautiful and intelligent and driven and kind and generous and dedicated and sweet and funny and sarcastic and faithful and more and more and more.
I hope you had a great birthday!
I love you lots,
Marie
19 years old and such a wonderful young lady.
I wonder how much longer you'll ask for our opinion.
I wonder what you think of us now that you've had "freedom".
I wonder if you know how much you mean to me.
I wonder if you know how much I miss you, your presence, your laugh, your thoughts.
I wonder if you know much much I don't miss losing Skip-Bo to you (ha!).
I wonder if you know what joy watching you and your brothers together gives me.
You sweet A, are my all time favorite daughter.
You are strong and courageous and bold and loyal and adventurous and beautiful and intelligent and driven and kind and generous and dedicated and sweet and funny and sarcastic and faithful and more and more and more.
I hope you had a great birthday!
I love you lots,
Marie
Monkey Business
So earlier this month we celebrated your 11th birthday.
This one boggles my mind because I distinctly remember being 11. I remember my teacher and classmates and the clothes I wore (yikes!) and my feelings and my home life.
Right now you are in this weird stage where you have many different interests and come up with new ones daily (or so it seems).
You have really gotten to be more adventurous and have become more social this year. You've made lots of new friends and you ride your bike all over the neighborhood, playing basketball and football and skateboarding. You love to YouTube and make videos with your friends. You have a heart for the kids with special needs and you aren't afraid to show kindness and love to them. Baseball has been your sport however you're talking about other sports lately.
Monkey, you are in this tender age of little boy and pre-teen. You haven't quite decided where you land and that's just fine with me. We can snuggle and talk about teen stuff all at the same time!
This is your last year of elementary school and I wonder what middle school will look like for you. You are head strong and driven regarding your passions and I pray that you move into the next three years with as much confidence and gusto as you have these last few.
As we embarked in Foster Care you were the first to offer up your room. Little did you know you'd be sharing with two little boys. It hasn't been easy for you but you have been able to see the best of it all and have embraced the changes.
You are one of my most favorite people to be around. Your passion for your projects is infectious.
I love you so much, Monkey and I can't wait to see what this year will bring!
Mom
xo
This one boggles my mind because I distinctly remember being 11. I remember my teacher and classmates and the clothes I wore (yikes!) and my feelings and my home life.
Right now you are in this weird stage where you have many different interests and come up with new ones daily (or so it seems).
You have really gotten to be more adventurous and have become more social this year. You've made lots of new friends and you ride your bike all over the neighborhood, playing basketball and football and skateboarding. You love to YouTube and make videos with your friends. You have a heart for the kids with special needs and you aren't afraid to show kindness and love to them. Baseball has been your sport however you're talking about other sports lately.
Monkey, you are in this tender age of little boy and pre-teen. You haven't quite decided where you land and that's just fine with me. We can snuggle and talk about teen stuff all at the same time!
This is your last year of elementary school and I wonder what middle school will look like for you. You are head strong and driven regarding your passions and I pray that you move into the next three years with as much confidence and gusto as you have these last few.
As we embarked in Foster Care you were the first to offer up your room. Little did you know you'd be sharing with two little boys. It hasn't been easy for you but you have been able to see the best of it all and have embraced the changes.
You are one of my most favorite people to be around. Your passion for your projects is infectious.
I love you so much, Monkey and I can't wait to see what this year will bring!
Mom
xo
It's been a while
I thought I was done with blogging.
Little time and mixed up thoughts were keeping my words from reaching the blog.
So much time has passed and we're in a new chapter in our lives.
We are now foster parents.
It took 30 hours of classes, months of back and forth about our license and a few family meetings.
Here we are.
What does that look like? It looks like fragile hearts, busy schedules, and early morning feedings.
We have and 11 children in our home since June. We are loving and caring for 9, 10, and 11 right now. There have been many tears shed, lots of adjusting and readjusting, lots of prayers and lots of love.
Why do we foster? Because every child deserves a chance to thrive. Every parent deserves time to make it right again. Every heart deserves to be mended.
My heart has been all over the place lately and sometimes it spills over with feelings and sometimes it needs mending. I hope coming back to writing will help me process this all.
Little time and mixed up thoughts were keeping my words from reaching the blog.
So much time has passed and we're in a new chapter in our lives.
We are now foster parents.
It took 30 hours of classes, months of back and forth about our license and a few family meetings.
Here we are.
What does that look like? It looks like fragile hearts, busy schedules, and early morning feedings.
We have and 11 children in our home since June. We are loving and caring for 9, 10, and 11 right now. There have been many tears shed, lots of adjusting and readjusting, lots of prayers and lots of love.
Why do we foster? Because every child deserves a chance to thrive. Every parent deserves time to make it right again. Every heart deserves to be mended.
My heart has been all over the place lately and sometimes it spills over with feelings and sometimes it needs mending. I hope coming back to writing will help me process this all.
Thursday, April 6, 2017
Parenting = Challenges
Lately I feel like I have no idea what I'm doing.
I don't.
So that's a fair assessment.
Parenting is challenging. Like for real.
I constantly wonder if I say the right things, if I said too much, if I didn't say enough.
I get eye rolls and huffs and I wonder if I crossed the line or if it's them and not me.
I am terrified that they will fall into the "wrong group" or that they will make mistakes with harsh consequences.
I am well aware that I am holding onto more than I can handle and that the right thing to do right now is to give it all to Him, because who am I kidding, He's got it.
So once again, I'm standing back on my grounded identity.
Lord, I relinquish parenting to you. I pray that I may be the best messenger that you have, that I am an example of Your love to these three kiddos. That you will hold me up when I feel like falling. That you will guide me when I stumble and that you will open the hearts of my kids to receive you now and throughout their lives. Help them, Lord, to rely on you and only you. To give and receive grace. To view the world through your eyes. Help me, Lord to guide them through the murky waters of this world and to show them your loving kindness and the hope that you bring this darkness.
Amen.
I don't.
So that's a fair assessment.
Parenting is challenging. Like for real.
I constantly wonder if I say the right things, if I said too much, if I didn't say enough.
I get eye rolls and huffs and I wonder if I crossed the line or if it's them and not me.
I am terrified that they will fall into the "wrong group" or that they will make mistakes with harsh consequences.
I am well aware that I am holding onto more than I can handle and that the right thing to do right now is to give it all to Him, because who am I kidding, He's got it.
So once again, I'm standing back on my grounded identity.
Lord, I relinquish parenting to you. I pray that I may be the best messenger that you have, that I am an example of Your love to these three kiddos. That you will hold me up when I feel like falling. That you will guide me when I stumble and that you will open the hearts of my kids to receive you now and throughout their lives. Help them, Lord, to rely on you and only you. To give and receive grace. To view the world through your eyes. Help me, Lord to guide them through the murky waters of this world and to show them your loving kindness and the hope that you bring this darkness.
Amen.
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